THE TOOLS STUTZ PDF
C0NFIDENCE,. AND CREATIVITY. Phil Stutz and. Barry Michels. The. T ls The figure at the upper right represents you lying on. TOOLS. DEATHBED. That was where I met Dr. Phil Stutz, the coauthor of this book. That seminar He was laying himself, his theories, and his tools out in the open. He didn't. The Tools: 5 Tools to help you find courage, creativity and willpower- and inspire you to live life in forward motion. By Phil Stutz & Barry Michels. Chapter 1.
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For years, psychotherapists Phil Stutz and Barry Michels taught The Tools to an exclusive patient base. Now, through books, online resources, and live events. Read The Tools: 5 Tools to Help You Find Courage, Creativity, and Willpower-- and Inspire You toLive Life in Forward Motion PDF Ebook by Phi. Stutz and Michels are two no-nonsense therapists who developed powerful tools to transform our problems into courage, confidence, and creativity. In this Note, we'll take a quick peek at PDF Mockup. Download PDF. Get instant access!.
S4M —dc23 www. Jamie Keenan Author photograph: Kwaku Alston v3. She had come to me with a very speci c goal: Even now, in her mid-twenties, she was still terri ed of abandonment. But my meeting with her took place twenty- ve years ago when I was a new psychotherapist. I felt the directness of her request shoot through me like an arrow. I had no response. I had just spent two years devouring every current theory of psychotherapeutic practice.
But the more information I digested, the more unsatis ed I became. The theories felt removed from the actual experience someone would have when he or she was in trouble and needed help. I had developed close ties to two of my supervisors—not only did they know me well, but they had many decades of clinical experience. Surely, they must have developed some way to meet these requests.
Their response con rmed my worst fears. They had no solution. Worse, what seemed to me like a reasonable request, they saw as part of her problem. They used a lot of clinical terms: Unanimously, they advised me to guide her back to her childhood—there we would nd what caused the obsession in the rst place.
I told them she already knew why she w a s obsessed. Then I got lucky. That was where I met Dr. Phil Stutz, the coauthor of this book. That seminar changed my practice—and my life. Everything about the way Phil thought seemed completely new. More important, in my gut it felt like the truth. He was absolutely con dent that human beings possessed untapped forces that allowed them to solve their own problems.
I was skeptical at rst. Phil made it clear and concrete. You had to tap into hidden resources by means of certain powerful but simple techniques that anyone could use.
He was laying himself, his theories, and his tools out in the open. He almost dared us to prove him wrong. He struck me as very brave or mad—possibly both.
But in any case, the e ect on me was catalyzing, like bursting out into the fresh air after the su ocating dogma of my more traditional colleagues. I saw even more clearly how much they hid behind an impenetrable wall of convoluted ideas, none of which they felt the need to test or experience for themselves. I had learned only one tool at the seminar, but as soon as I left, I practiced it religiously.
I was sure it would help her more than delving deeper into her past. To my amazement, she seized on it and started using it immediately. More amazingly, it helped. My colleagues had been wrong. I found myself hungering for more—more information, more tools; a deeper understanding of how they worked. Was this just a grab bag of di erent techniques, or was it what I suspected—a whole new way of looking at human beings?
In an e ort to get answers, I began to corner Phil at the end of each seminar and squeeze as much information as I could out of him. I was insatiable. Which brought up another issue. What I was learning from Phil was so powerful that I wanted it to be the core of my work with patients.
But there was no training program to apply to, no academic hurdles to jump over. That was stu I was good at, but he seemed to have no interest in it, which made me feel insecure. How could I qualify to be trained? Would he even think of me as a candidate? Was I turning him o with my questions? Not too long after I began giving the seminars, this intense young guy named Barry Michels began to show up.
With some hesitation, he identi ed himself as a therapist, although, given the detailed way he questioned me, he sounded more like a lawyer. Whatever he was, he was really smart. But he seemed open-minded, so I decided to give it a try.
It was a somewhat unusual story, that began with the very first patients I treated, and one in particular. Tony was a young surgical resident at the hospital where I was a resident in psychiatry. All tests scared him—and this one was a big one. It was his board-certi cation exam in surgery. His father had made a fortune in dry cleaning but was a college dropout with deep feelings of inferiority. On the surface, he wanted his son to become a famous surgeon to gain a vicarious sense of success.
But underneath, he was so insecure that he was threatened by the idea of his son surpassing him. Tony was unconsciously terri ed to succeed for this reason: Failing his exams was his way of keeping himself safe.
When I gave this interpretation to Tony, he was skeptical. My father has never pushed me to do anything for his sake. But as the day of the test drew closer, his anxiety returned.
He wanted to postpone the exam.
I assured him this was just his unconscious fear of his father. All he had to do was keep talking about it, and it would go away again. This was the traditional, time-tested approach to his problem. I was wrong. He failed miserably.
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We had one last session after that. He still looked like a trapped rat, but this time an angry trapped rat. His words echoed in my ears. Talking about my father every time was like ghting a gorilla with a water pistol. You failed me.
I realized how helpless patients could feel facing a problem by themselves. What they needed were solutions that would give them the power to ght back. I had a series of other, less spectacular failures. In each case, a patient was in some state of su ering: They pleaded with me for a way to make their pain go away. I had no idea how to help them. I was experienced at dealing with failure.
I was addicted to basketball growing up and played with kids bigger and better than I was. Actually, almost everybody was bigger than I was. If I performed badly at basketball, I just practiced more.
This was di erent. It was as though someone took the ball away. My supervisors were sincere and dedicated, but they attributed my doubts to inexperience. They told me most young therapists doubt themselves, but as time passes, they learn that therapy can only do so much.
But those limitations were unacceptable to me. I decided I would nd a way to do this no matter where it took me. Looking back, I realize that this was the next step on a path that had started when I was a child. When I was nine, my three-year-old brother died of a rare cancer. My parents, who had limited emotional resources, never recovered. A cloud of doom hung over them. This tragedy changed my role in the family. Their hope for the future became focused on me —as if I had a special power to make the doom go away.
Each evening my father would come home from work, sit in his rocking chair, and worry. Over the next few years, I realized my job was to reassure him. I was twelve years old. Not that I thought about it that way. As unrealistic as that fear was, it felt absolutely real at the time. Being under that kind of pressure as a kid gave me strength when I grew up and got real patients. One thing I was sure of: I was on my own.
There were no books I could read, no experts I could correspond with, no training programs I could apply to. All I had to go on was my instincts. My instincts led me into the present. The past has memories, emotions, and insights, all of which have value. But I was looking for something powerful enough to bring relief right now.
To nd it, I had to stay in the present. I had only one rule: I had to come up with something on the spot.
Working without a net, I got in the habit of saying out loud whatever occurred to me that might help the patient. I got to the point where I could talk without knowing what I was going to say next. It began to feel as though some other force was speaking through me. Little by little, the tools in this book and the philosophy behind them made themselves known.
The only standard they had to meet was that they worked. Real change requires you to change your behavior—not just your attitude. You now have a new attitude about screaming. You may feel enlightened and better about yourself … until an employee makes a costly mistake. At which point you start screaming without even thinking. To control behavior you need a speci c procedure to use at a specific time to combat a specific problem.
A new attitude means nothing unless followed by a change in behavior. The surest way to change behavior is with a tool. The most profound value of a tool is that it takes you beyond what happens inside your head. It connects you to a world in nitely bigger than you are, a world of limitless forces. The information would emerge in a crude, un nished form at rst.
My patients never complained; in fact, they liked being part of creating something. All they asked is that the tool help them. The process made me vulnerable to them. This work was more of a joint e ort—which was actually a relief. Teaching them the tools was my way of giving them the ultimate gift—the ability to change their lives.
That made it tremendously satisfying each time a tool was fully developed.
In the process of developing the tools, it would be surprisingly clear when a tool was fully formed. It never felt like I made it up out of thin air; I had the distinct impression that I was uncovering something that already existed.
What I did bring to the table was faith that, for each problem I could identify, there was a tool to be discovered that would bring relief. I was like a dog with a bone until the tool appeared. That faith was about to be rewarded in a way I never could have imagined.
As time went by, I observed what happened to patients who used the tools regularly. But something else—something unexpected—was happening. They began to develop new abilities. They were having an impact on the world around them—often for the first time in their lives.
The same tools that relieved pain in the present, when used over time, were a ecting every part of their lives. To make sense out of this, I had to expand my focus beyond the tools themselves and take a closer look at the higher forces they were releasing. So have you—every human being has experienced them. They have a hidden, unexpected power that lets us do things we usually think of as impossible. But, for most people, the only time we have access to them is in an emergency. Then, we can act with heightened courage and resourcefulness—but as soon as the emergency is over, the powers go away; we forget we even have them.
My patients were functioning as if they had access to these forces every day. Using the tools, the forces could be generated at will. This discovery revolutionized my view of how psychotherapy should work. But the therapist had to do more than just see the problems as catalysts. His job was to give the patient concrete access to the forces that were needed to solve the problems. These forces had to be felt, not just talked about.
That required something therapy had never provided: I had just spent an hour pouring out a tremendous amount of information. Barry had taken it all in stride, nodding vigorously at points. There was only one y in the ointment. Most of what Phil had said was revelatory.
I absorbed it like a sponge and was ready to use it on my patients. Then he interrupted my thoughts. The last time I felt like this was when I got caught putting sugar on my cereal as a kid. Are you absolutely sure about these higher forces?
By age twenty-two, I had gained admission to one of the best law schools in the country. By age twenty- ve, I had graduated near the top of my class and was hired immediately by a prestigious law rm. Having conquered the system, I stood at the top of the mountain—and I hated it right away. It was stu y, conservative, and boring. I constantly fought the urge to quit. But somehow I did quit. I remembered the day very well.
I was twenty-eight years old, standing in the lobby of the o ce building where I worked, staring into the silent, glazed-over faces passing by on the sidewalk outside. For a moment, to my horror, I saw my own face in the re ection of the window. My eyes looked dead. Suddenly I felt I was in jeopardy of losing everything and becoming one of those gray-suited zombies. I quit on the spot. As I described this to Phil, he got excited. You felt a higher force in action.
Whatever you called the force that allowed me to change my life—I knew it was real. I had felt it. That got their attention in a way nothing else ever had. The feedback was uniformly positive.
The tools by phil stutz and barry michels
Many commented on how much more productive the sessions seemed. It changed everything. I was feeling more ful lled than ever before. And sure enough, I noticed the same changes in my patients that Phil saw when he was discovering the tools. Their lives were expanding in unexpected ways. They were becoming better leaders, better parents; they were bolder in every area of their lives.
Twenty- ve years have passed since Phil and I met. The tools delivered exactly what he said they would: The more I used the tools, the more clearly I felt that these forces came through me, not from me—they were a gift from somewhere else. Over time, I was able to accept that these new powers were given to me by higher forces.
The purpose of this book is to give you the same access. These forces will revolutionize the way you look at your life and your problems. How much happiness and satisfaction you get out of life will depend on how well you can free yourself from those problems. Each of the next four chapters addresses one of these. Each chapter also provides you with the tool that works most e ectively on that problem.
You may not see your problems exactly re ected in the struggles of the patients we discuss. It matters less what form your problem takes than that you use the tools. As you do, you might nd yourself questioning some of the ideas. But the real answers are in the tools; using them will allow you to experience the e ect of higher forces. You might think this is all you need. It may surprise you, but most people stop using the tools even though they work. This is one of the most maddening things about human nature: This is where the rubber meets the road.
Chapter 6 tells you how. It gives you a fth tool, in some ways the most crucial one. Some would even call this the existential issue of the modern age—how to have faith in something completely intangible. Chapter 7 will document my struggle to place my trust in these forces and help you to do the same.
Believe me, if I learned to have faith, anyone can. Phil had one more crazy idea up his sleeve. He claimed that every time anyone used a tool, the higher forces evoked would bene t not just the individual, but everyone around him or her.
Over the years, this seemed less and less crazy. Chapter 8 gives you a way to experience it for yourself. The health of our society depends on the e orts of each individual. Every time one of us gains access to higher forces, all of us bene t. That places a special responsibility on those who know how to use the tools. They become the rst to bring higher forces to the rest of the society.
They are pioneers, building a new, reinvigorated community. I wake up every morning grateful that higher forces are there. They never stop revealing themselves in new ways. Through this book we share their magic with you. At our rst session, I greeted him in the waiting room, and he barked sarcastically: IKEA would be a big step up for you.
His manager had devoted himself to getting Vinny into successful venues—bigger clubs, talk shows, sitcoms. Despite sti competition for these opportunities, Vinny had a good shot. He was very funny. That was the last straw for his manager, who threatened to re Vinny unless he saw me.
I asked Vinny why he no-showed. His excuse—the rst of many—was ludicrous. Too much stress. The missed meeting was only the latest instance of self-sabotage. In another asco, his manager booked him into a large amphitheater for a charity fund-raising event. His act started strong, but Vinny was booed o the stage when he started telling o ensive jokes.
He seemed to relish putting people o. Maybe they do you a favor. I called his bluff. You can arrange your own club dates. These situations made him vulnerable, and he avoided them like the plague. I asked him what was so bad about needing something from others. After some questioning, he revealed why. It drove him crazy. Be serious. He never wanted to give anyone else the chance to in ict pain on him again.
You may not have made the same kind of sacri ce Vinny had. He avoided doing anything that made him feel exposed: Try the following exercise all exercises are best done with your eyes closed: Pick something you hate doing. It could be traveling, meeting new people, family gatherings, etc. How do you organize your life so you can avoid doing it?
Imagine that pattern is a place you hide in. What does it feel like? You probably felt you were in a safe and familiar place, free of the pain the world brings with it. This almost completely re-creates your Comfort Zone, but it leaves out the nal ingredient. We insist that the pain be replaced with pleasure. We do this with an endless array of addictive activities: We weave these activities into our daily routines.
Vinny, for example, spent every evening getting high with the same friends, eating pizza, and playing video games. The more you hide in the warm bath, the less willing you become to deal with the cold shower of reality. Ask yourself what your own warm-bath activities are. Now try the following exercise: Feel yourself indulging in one or more of these behaviors. Imagine the pleasure you feel lifts you into a womb-like world. How does this world affect your sense of purpose?
Whatever your Comfort Zone consists of, you pay a huge price for it. There are many di erent examples of this. The Comfort Zone is supposed to keep your life safe, but what it really does is keep your life small. Vinny was a good example. Every area of life—his career, friendships, even his romantic life—was a shrunken miniature of what it could have been.
Most of us are like the stick gure, stuck inside the Comfort Zone. To take advantage of the endless possibilities that life provides us, we have to venture out. The rst thing we meet is pain. Without a way to get through it, we scurry back to safety.
This is depicted in the arrow that goes out, comes close to pain, and turns back again. Eventually, we give up on ever escaping the Comfort Zone; our most treasured dreams and aspirations are lost. Why not? The Comfort Zone makes us feel good in the moment. Who cares what the future penalty will be? And we have an extraordinary ability to rationalize this weakness. This is the worst sin of all—lying to ourselves. I explained all of this to Vinny. Just having an understanding of why he was so stuck made him feel a little better.
He thanked me and started bustling out the door. Vinny looked startled. Do you want to accept that penalty? But he sat back down again.
For the rst time, I saw in his eyes the hope that his life could be better than it was. They drive through tremendous amounts of pain—from rejections and failures to shorter moments of embarrassment and anxiety. Because they avoid nothing, they can pursue their highest aspirations. They seem more alive than the rest of us. They have something that gives them the strength to endure pain—a sense of purpose.
What they do in the present, no matter how painful, has meaning in terms of what they want for the future.
The avoider only cares about immediate grati cation; he takes no responsibility for his future. It comes from taking action that moves you toward the future. The moment you do this, you activate a force more powerful than the desire to avoid pain.
These powers are invisible, but their e ects are all around you. This is most obvious for the Force of Forward Motion. Its power is the power of life itself. Its power has touched your own life as well. You started life as a helpless infant; yet in a remarkably short time, you moved from crawling to standing to walking.
You did this despite countless painful setbacks. Watch a child learning to walk now. No matter how many times he falls, he soon picks himself back up to pursue his goal. This force drives children to develop the basic skills they need to grow up.
Things are di erent in adults. The central task of an adult is to nd her purpose in the world. The Force of Forward Motion only works in an individual if she consciously chooses to use it—and accepts the pain that comes with it. Most of us choose avoidance instead. Vinny was a great example. That decision made him into a bitter, limited version of who he was meant to be.
For Vinny, the Force of Forward Motion was just a bunch of words.
He needed to feel that force move him from the inside before he could have any faith in it. As far as I was concerned this visceral experience was precisely what was missing from traditional psychotherapy.
Therapy could elicit ideas and emotions—but it had no direct way to connect patients to the forces they needed to change their lives. The tools were designed to take advantage of the unusual nature of higher forces. These forces are separate from us, we control them from the outside. To harness a higher force, you have to become one with it. You do that by taking on the same form the force takes—making yourself into a miniversion of it. No amount of thinking can do this for you; you need to change your state of being.
The book explains the nature of the ve basic higher forces. Then, for each force, it teaches you the tool that aligns you with it. To tap into this force, you need to move relentlessly forward in your own life—only then have you taken on its form. But doing that is not so easy. By now, you know we avoid the pain of forward motion at all costs. Phil seemed undaunted by this nasty human weakness. I asked him what made him so certain. This sounded strange, even for Phil.
I wondered if he was some kind of a masochist— or worse. Then he told me the following story and I saw the method to his madness. I was a sophomore in high school at age thirteen—a skinny runt in an all-male student body, every one of whom seemed to tower over me. The most dreaded part of the week was the mechanical drawing class. What's one of the new tools that will be in the next book? This Tool is a way of infusing yourself with a sense that you still have a future and you can still work toward it.
Omega: Who are your biggest influences? What wisdom moves and inspires you? Phil: My biggest influence by far is Rudolph Steiner. He started out as a philosopher and then switched to the study of the spiritual world. He was a prolific author and speaker and had such credibility—there was no power trip, no hierarchy, nothing. He connected the evolution of human consciousness with the history of philosophy, political history, the history of science, the history of art.
I'm gonna show you how to render yourself evolved enough to actually see for yourself what the spiritual world is comprised of. He not only revolutionized the way I did therapy, he helped me change as a human being. I just would not be the person I am without him. He's just had an incredible influence on every aspect of my life. Many people write about the power of spirituality, but they do it from kind of a removed theoretical perspective.
I have been using modified versions of the tools from the book in my therapy practice and in my personal life. I think they're wonderful and I plan on continuing to use and practice these neat little life hacks. I love shit that works and I'd rather be effective than "right". If I have to swallow a little sugar to get the dope, than OK. All that aside, I cannot bring myself to strongly endorse a book that is as philosophically and methodologically problematic as this one.
First and foremost, the authors establish the legitimacy of their method by stating that they have tried The Tools in their practice and it works. This is a huge red flag for anyone trained in the social sciences. This particular problem relying on the clinicians judgment to gauge the effectiveness of the treatment plagued psychotherapy for its first century.This sounded strange, even for Phil. She spoke to him a number of times, exchanged e-mails with a local sportswriter, and approached anyone else who might have some say.
He never hesitated to answer my questions—and I peppered him with thousands of them; and unlike others, he never took it personally or shied away from me if I challenged the answers he gave me. The more I used the tools, the more clearly I felt that these forces came through me, not from me—they were a gift from somewhere else.
I'm gonna show you how to render yourself evolved enough to actually see for yourself what the spiritual world is comprised of. It felt real. If you are a seller for this product, would you like to suggest updates through seller support? Learn more about Amazon Prime. The rst cue comes when you have to do something uncomfortable and you feel fear or resistance.
Like children, we expect love to be e ortless.